Comments on: Breaking up when you’re pregnant

By: Emily

Emily — Fri, 19 Aug 2011 03:39:15 +0000

We’re just fighting all the time, I just feel like we’re always clashing..but weve only been together now for a year so that prob. has alot to do with it I guess? But what I didn’t mention was he’s deployed and he’s just not making an effort to keep in contact with me, so when we do happen to talk it’s never good, we always fight..no I haven’t looked into anything like that but if him and I are still together when he comes home then that could be an option..it’s just so stressful for me now and he doesn’t even care about me it seems . I just don’t know if I should just deal with it and hope it’ll get better soon or not

By: Rachel Sarah

Rachel Sarah — Fri, 19 Aug 2011 00:16:32 +0000

@Emily: thanks for reaching out to us. Please tell us what’s challenging right now about your relationship. We’re here to help.
We’re wondering if you’ve reached out for couple’s support — from say a church or services for teen moms?
Keep in touch.

By: Emily

Emily — Thu, 18 Aug 2011 22:58:07 +0000

I recently turned 19 years old, and I am 8 months pregnant. I am married but recently have found myself so unhappy. We were not together long (4 months) before my husband and I got hitched. If I was not pregnant I wouldn’t even question whether I wanted to stay in a relationship I was not happy in. But I am pregnant and I’m scared leaving him would be a stupid choice since he does pay the bills…should I wait it out and see what happens when the baby comes even if I’m unhappy? I’ve heard being a single mom is just so hard and I am so young I’ll need all the help I can get. I also feel selfish for thinking about my happiness rather than my unborn childs happiness..I just don’t know what to do.

By: Dr. Leah

Dr. Leah — Sun, 31 Jul 2011 11:14:24 +0000

Vicky: Many of us can relate to feeling ashamed at first. But, soon discovering that the joys of raising a child are endless. Thank you for sharing your story with us.

By: Vicky

Vicky — Sun, 31 Jul 2011 08:29:15 +0000

I’ve been a single mum seen my child’s father left when I was 4 months pregnant that was 9 years ago and we not seen him since, he too was ready for fatherhood and moved away without giving my his address. He doesn’t even pay child support. It was the hardest thing I ever done I missed out on so much having to face scans and labour alone. I also felt a sense of shame. That said 9 years later I’m so happy and I wouldn’t change a thing. My son is wonderful and every fathers dad is hard on him but we have such fun together that we wouldn’t be able to do if his father was around. Take joy for the small moments just because your alone doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy it. Find other mums in your area that are if the same boat. Don’t let the fact your alone rob you of the joys of motherhood. You can do this alone it’s hard challening but so fun too.

By: Rachel Sarah

Rachel Sarah — Sun, 31 Jul 2011 06:46:58 +0000

@Michelle: thank you for those wise words… We can’t control other’s actions, only are own — which gives us the power to live well!

By: Nikki

Nikki — Sun, 31 Jul 2011 06:31:25 +0000

I met a man, got pregnant immediately, then he left just as immediately. It was the most emotionally turbulent time in my life; my entire world turned on its head. Not only was I pregnant alone, but…in the church. I was fortunate to be in a church who chose to pour love and grace into my situation rather than judgment and condemnation. I have my daughter 24/7 and it is the most challenging thing in this life, but I’m grateful. I’ve learned so much through my new lens, which is her.

What helped me through pregnancy and through this single mama journey is a community that loves us and supports us. It takes an army, and it means tearing down some walls and accepting help; sometimes having to ask for it outright. It is humbling, but children are worth tearing those walls down and asking. I could not do this ‘alone’.

By: Michelle

Michelle — Sun, 31 Jul 2011 02:51:39 +0000

Wow. I feel this blast from the past moment right now. Nearly 3 years ago, the man I was dating (and totally in love with…) just picked up and left while I was just 3 months pregnant. We were talking wedding plans and he had recently accepted a new and wonderful job position in another state, and we were planning to move asap. However, something came over him…and he told me he was going to move to this new state, but without me. Suddenly he didn’t want to be a father…and/or wasn’t ready…It was the hardest thing I’ve ever survived. And that’s what I did. i survived. Just know that healing doesn’t come overnight. For me, it took a few years. He’s made his way slowly back into my son’s life, but for the most part…is not even in the picture. We can’t control what others will do in life…we can only do the very best in our own—and live on! : )

By: Elizabeth

Elizabeth — Sun, 31 Jul 2011 02:43:19 +0000

My daughter’s dad also wasn’t ready to be a dad. The best thing I did was not putting his name on any of the paperwork. I have 100 percent legal control of her. As far as she knows, she doesn’t have a dad and she has always bee good with it.

By: Rachel Sarah

Rachel Sarah — Sun, 31 Jul 2011 01:08:34 +0000

Jordan — We are here for you! Do have others you can reach out to right now? Family? Friends?